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| Family Matters |
The Good Financial Parent
Lee Hausner, Ph.D
01/01/2004
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The answer to this question is far from simple. Children, as the Halperts have discovered, do not come with detailed instruction manuals any more than we, as parents, are imbued with farseeing wisdom regarding our offspring. Every family confronts in their own way the same challenges as the Halperts; yet the latter’s well-meaning, though ill-fated, substitution of their material success for responsible parenting remains a familiar motif that runs throughout many affluent families. As parents, we must take steps to ensure that we do everything possible to develop in our children the strength of character on which they will depend in assuming the responsibilities of our wealth. This is the essence of good financial parenting. To accomplish this goal—and to avoid the pain and distress the Halpert’s experienced—we must each address the following five challenges:1. Realistic expectations
2. Competency training
3. Effective communication
4. Overindulgence
5. Financial parenting |
Before tackling these points individually, we should understand them first in the context of the overall importance of self-esteem. Contrary to what many believe, self-esteem is no more easily come by in affluent families than in others—and, in fact, is sometimes hindered by circumstances unique to that environment. Affluent parents should take particular care to cultivate this vital quality, which has two critical components:1. The
belief of the individual that he is OK and lovable unconditionally. It is not necessary to be the straight-A student, the star athlete, the social directress, class president or the outstanding musician to be loved and respected within the family. There need be no performance requirement. 2. The belief of the individual that she is competent to go out into the world and function successfully, both physically and intellectually, without depending upon the wealth of the family. |
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